You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
