I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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