Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
