You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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