just come out here and I will go home with you...
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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