How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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