we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Randomize
