is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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