Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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