Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
