I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
