so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
