i just wanna soil my oats bro
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
