yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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