after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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