no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
