? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize