I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
