watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
