i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
