whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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