Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Who died my cat blue again?
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