What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
