Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
