I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
