ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
how does that bad decision feel?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
