I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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