how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
