Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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