and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
