are you still at the devil's house?
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
sex in a hospital.. check
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
