i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
He shit in the fireplace
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