I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
She's just so happy...and so naked.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
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