my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
