That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
