she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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