What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
