I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
meet me or not, i'm out of control
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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