Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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