I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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