I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Randomize
