I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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