I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
