She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
