Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
is it fun? or sober?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
