There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
In other news, I just burned my penis
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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