I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
They took my balls.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
