Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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