I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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