JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
